I had a really psychadelic vison while I was meditating yesterday. It was like a huge eye, filling my field of vision, with the colours all falling towards the centre like a waterfall. No idea what it meant. But I felt content.
The experience did however follow on the heals of a inner shift over weekend, that came from a reading of the Prodigal Son which highlighed the deep truth that "The father is equally gracious to both sons because both were lost. One was lost in licentiousness. The other was lost in self righteousness." (Randy Newman, Bringing the Gospel Home)
Having long identified with those on the fringe of Christianity I've tended to identify with the younger brother more than the elder brother in the readings of that story. However, the truth is I've been a disciple of Christ for more than sixteen years now, so if I'm at risk of anything it's the elder brother attitude. I sensed myself letting go of something that I've obviously been holding onto. An understanding of my own identity? An understanding of grace? It was deeper than I can easily articulate. I mean, I know these things. But it hit at a deeper level of knowing. And I feel lighter.